Danny Glover pulls gun during snowball fight

Imagine being Danny Glover. Everytime you sit down to take a dump, some asshole’s booby trapped your toilet. You can imagine the  frustration. Well, Glover finally boiled over this week when he pulled a gun at a snowball fight. All this video’s missing  is a “Son of bitch” or perhaps a “I’m too old for this shit.”

Keeping with the theme of black rage, let’s move on to this surveillance footage of a woman losing her shit at a Kansas City McDonald’s. As for a cheesy news headline, the contenders are “Unhappy Meal,” “Big Mac Mamma” and “Super Sized Bitch Goes Crazy.” The best part of this story is that police are still looking for her. She’s a fugitive. Incredible.

From black people to perhaps the whitest man ever, Michael Cera. Cera may always play the same character, but guess what, that’s what every comedian throughout history has done. They develop schticks to make us laugh.  And he’s got a good one. Cera’s new movie “Youth in Revolt” looks promising, but his real tour de force performance comes in this Femme Nikita clip he showed on Letterman Monday.

If you thought that clip was ridiculous, this next one….well, wow. Afghanistan’s national game, buzkashi, is attempting a marketing transformation in order to gain acceptance in the Olympics. The rules of this game can be read here, but just to give you a taste:

Buzkashi translated into English means “goat grabbing” and is a team sport similar to polo, with a few exceptions. There doesn’t appear to be many rules and instead of using a ball, a decapitated goat carcass is used. Here’s an excellent clip of the sport:

The best part of this story is that the Taliban banned the sport in Afghanistan, touting it as “immoral.” Apparently they insisted the goats be replaced with women. But seriously, if the Taliban call it immoral, you know it has to be good.

Lastly, check out these pandas playing doubles behind Andy Roddick. Bad headline contenders include “Love, Love”, “Overhead Smush” and “The Only Slam Andy Roddick will ever be close to.”