More clubs linked to cheating Mickelson

In a scandal that has rocked the sports world, just five days after being accused of cheating with a Ping-Eye 2 wedge, Phil Mickelson has been linked with up to 19 more “dirty” clubs.

Troubles began for Mickelson at Torrey Pines on Friday when he crashed his golf cart into a a tree. After the accident knocked Mickelson out cold, playing partner Scott McCarron helped gather the contents of Phil’s bag until tournament officials arrived. Witnesses at the 3rd hole said they saw McCarron checking Mickelson’s golf bag, then arguing with the large-breasted golfer right before the accident.

Later, news spilled that McCarron found evidence that Lefty was cheating with a wedge that was created over 20 years ago. While it was technically wrong to go a couple of rounds with the Ping-Eye 2 wedge, tournament officials decided not to penalize Mickelson because it wasn’t actually illegal.

Sentiment quickly changed when Usmagazine.com produced a phone conversation where Mickelson appears to be telling his caddy Jim “Bones” Mackay to get rid of another club.

“Hey, it’s Phil,” he says in the voicemail, “I need you to do me a huge favour. Can you please take that club out of my bag? Scott McCarron went through my bag and may be calling you. So if you can, please take the clubs out.  You got to do this for me. Huge. Quickly. Bye.”

Since then, the website TMZ.com has published pictures of increasingly “dirty” clubs. While the Ping-Eye 2 wedge was a beautiful club that any golfer would love to try, the Ping-Grubbs appeared absolutely filthy at first glance. Worse still were Phil’s drivers. Often used in instructional videos for adults, these augmented clubs have a fake look and feel. Which is more than you can say about a couple of Phil’s irons, real old, beat-up looking things that most amateur golfers, or Hugh Grant, wouldn’t even touch (pictures below).

With public sentiment now heavily against him, Mickelson appears to have recommitted to the beautiful set of clubs that he’s golfed with for most of his career. However, after going unnoticed in his house for several years, the clubs are said to be cold, awkward to hold, and impossible to get a hole-in-one with.

After going on a hiatus from the PGA Tour, Mickelson’s now rumoured to be attending a Mississippi golf clinic with the legendary Hank Haney. When asked for comment, PGA Tour president Tim Finchem said, “Now we’re really fucked.”