Martin Brodeur is no Patrick Roy

I could start and end my Patrick Roy/Martin Brodeur comparison with the sentence “Roy never lost to Brian Boucher in five games,” but I’ll expand it a tad.

Roy was 151-94 (.616 winning percentage) in the postseason compared to Brodeur’s career playoff record of 99-82 (.546). In 15 years as a playoff starter, Marty has now failed to get out of the first round seven times – and three years straight. In 17 years in the playoffs, Roy’s teams only failed to make it out of the first round twice. One of those years was 1994 when Roy missed a game to have his appendix removed. He returned three nights later to stop 50 shots in an overtime win over the Bruins.

Roy also has one more Cup — four in total — than Brodeur and three Conn Smythe Trophies as playoff MVP. Marty has zero.

Don’t get me wrong. Brodeur is one of the best ever, but no matter how many 40-plus win seasons he piles up, he’s not the best. Not even close.

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In Philly’s 3-0 series clinching win over New Jersey on Thursday, Ian Laperriere took a Paul Martin slap shot to the face in the 3rd period.

He was left with a nasty cut over his right eye that took 60-70 stitches to close, or roughly, the same amount used to sew up the average Ben Roethlisberger victim.

Doctors say the damage done to Laperriere’s face is severe, but not quite as bad as the damage done to Ilya Kovalchuk’s market value.

I haven’t seen the photos yet, but apparently they’re hard to look at. Let’s take a peak:

Oh my god, it’s worse than I thought, he’s hideous. Just kidding Sens fans, here’s a Twitpic of Laperriere:

Speaking of the Senators, historians are now saying their 4-3 triple-overtime win over the Penguins on Thursday night has brought new meaning to the phrase “delaying the inevitable.”

After the game, Bob McKenzie compared Ottawa’s toughness to “a $2 steak.” Well, he would know.

In all seriousness though, you have to commend Leclaire for making 56 saves in his first career playoff start. Kelly Hrudey broke down Pascal’s performance after the game. Apparently he made 10 pad saves, 7 glove saves, 5 blocker saves and 34 tooth saves.

Okay, with all the lame jokes out of the way, let’s move on to the video portion of the program:

Kornheiser and Wilbon’s take on Ovechkin spraying that kid with snow:

Kornheiser and Wilbon’s take on those green guys at Canucks home games:

And this from Chris Reed, The Steve Network’s Western Canada correspondent:

Did you hear/see the shorthanded natural hat trick that Matt Calvert scored for the Wheat Kings the other night?

That shit is Crazy! Crazy Awesome!

Unfortunately I can’t find any highlights, but you can read about it here.